i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
