The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
that is very illegal...i love you.
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