I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
