and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize