All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize