I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
