Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you would pick up someone in the library
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
