Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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