I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
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