The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
