My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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