Yo dont text me then not text me
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize