It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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