That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
