Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize