I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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