By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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