D3 body, D1 cock
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
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