1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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