Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize