wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize