cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
you made out with another girl for some wings
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize