can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
