guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize