This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
