first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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