good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
