Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
