Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
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