i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
