The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Randomize
