the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
That was an excessively violent trivia night
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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