Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
