awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
