i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
50% drunk capacity currently
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
