she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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