So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize