EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
True college students do jello shots in the library
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
