the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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