Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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