i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
