i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Even the bartender felt bad for me
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
