I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
