I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize