Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
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