Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize