You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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