...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
