ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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