Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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